Peaches Prattlings

{December 29, 2020}   WW84

If you haven’t seen Wonder Woman 84 [WW84] this will have spoiler alerts, you can always come back later and see if we agree. Warning delivered.

WW84…lots of questions. Why did they make this movie? Why did I go see this movie? Why do I feel like I will never get my two and a half hours back in my life? What were they thinking? What happened?! Is that enough W’s?

I’m sorry, this won’t be a very positive review. The messages in the movie had some merit, in the end. Let’s see…you can’t wish your life into existence, you have to work for it. Every action has consequences. You can’t wish for someone else’s life, live the life you have an if you’re not happy, work on what will make you happy. you don’t know what anyone else is going through or what their lives are like when you wish for them. Envy is that green eyed monster and a nasty one.

The movie opens with Diana’s past on Themyscira, she is talking about the lessons she did not learn until later in life, as we watch Lilly Aspell, the same actress who played young Diana in the first movie, running and wishing she had just taken the time to listen. I wondered allowed, isn’t that childhood? She is still a child, but competing in an olympic sort of competition against some amazing Amazons and comes close. It was great to see Robin Wright, alive and well! She has a valuable lesson for young Diana, it is the truth that is important and you cannot take short cuts to achrieve your goals.

The next thing we know, it’s 1984 and the stereotypes are incredible! It was very comic-bookish in the portrayal of the 1980’s. The big hair, big framed glasses, leg warmers, fanny packs, Members-Only jackets, the colors, the mall, the leotards, the side ponies, I lost track. Some of it was fun to see, then think back and hope that stuff really doesn’t come back around!

Barbara Minerva was typical shy, introverted, just wanted to be liked and maybe even popular. She wants to be Diana, who she thinks has it all. Kristin Wiig did a great job as Barbara Minerva, then Cheetah. Actually, she did a much better job as Barbara Minerva than she did as the Cheetah. The Cheetah, to be honest, got to be a bit ridiculous. I honestly did like Barbara’s transformation, up until she was one step away from becoming the cat and then the CGI was terrible, I was not a fan. I thought, after she made the wish, that although the transition was very subtle, in stages, each stage was incredibly noticeable and spoke volumes. The clothing went from mousy to magnificent then, I don’t know what. I guess she was supposed to be bad arse, but she just looked tattered.

The other villain, Maxwell Lord, was played by Pedro Pascal and if you’re a fan of the Mandalorian, you may or may not recognize him and if you don’t, spoiler alert…he’s the Mandalorian and now you know what he looks like without the helmet! He’s your typical scamming con artist only out for himself and doesn’t care what he has to do or who he has to run over to get it. The only thing he seems to love, and it’s not a thing, is his son. He claims he wants to make his son proud, but I’m not so sure. He seems to want total world devastation, as long as he gets what he wants. Actually, he doesn’t want total world devastation, he just wants to be the guy with it all. “He who dies with the most toys wins”. As he gets more power, he gets drunk with it and tarnishes everyone and everything he touches or thinks about.

Diana, or Wonder Woman, is kind of sad. She’s never, in all her time on Earth, never opened up her heart to anyone, only carried a torch for Steve Trevor. And, because of a wish, Chris Pine was in the movie. I enjoyed that part. It was fun to see him discover the world of 1984, like watching a child discover and experience one new thing after another. To see them together brought back feelings from the first movie, but…as you can imagine, it can’t last forever. The more she fought losing him again, the weaker she got, not just from Barbara’s wish to be more like Diana.

There were a few cool things that happened, didn’t make up for the entire movie, but cool, none-the-less. Just as they got into a plane that happened to be on the back side of the Smithsonian, don’t get me started on all the plot holes in this movie, I asked PSM “where’s her invisible plane?” guess what happened next?! That…was cool. Then they drove through and above some fireworks because it was July 4th.

There were some big fight scenes and some ridiculous ones. I have told you before, I can suspend my beliefs up to a point. And so much of what made Wonder Woman a wonder woman wasn’t there. I got antsy in my seat, waiting for something to happen, waiting for Wonder Woman to do her thang and kick arse. It was slightly painful and I know that it was what was happening around her and what people were doing to each other and the planet through what Maxwell Lord was doing, but it was still hard.

In the opening, we learn about Asteria and what she did to save the Amazonians. We learn about the gold suit of armor that she wears while doing it and we saw a glimpse of it in Diana’s apartment. She tells Steve that she tracked the golden suit of armor down after years and years of searching and told us, through Steve, about the significance of Asteria and her gold suit. As things were spiriling, I kept asking…when is she putting on the gold suit? When is she putting on the gold suit? It honestly took too long, maybe rock bottom had to be hit, but here it comes, in all its glory.

It did the trick up to a point, it was really her talking to people, telling them to look to themselves and into their hearts and resind their wishes, that is the only way that people won’t destroy each other and we can save the planet before it’s too late.

In the end, Maxwell Lord resinds his wish because he realizes the only thing that truly matters is his son and the love he has for him and hopes he gets in return, which he does. Barbara Minerva is no longer the Cheetah, there was an epic, albiet unimpressive battle between Cheetah and Wonder Woman and now it’s over, and we have no idea what happens after we see her sitting on a rock looking at the sky, just an unanswered question…what happened to Barbara Minerva.

After losing Steve Trevor a second time, claiming that she will never love again, something happens and it seems like she’s opening herself up to the possibility of being happy, who knows. There is a chance encounter at the end of the movie with the guy Steve had been inhabiting, was there a love connection? No idea.

Best part…serious spoiler alert…the additional scene is of a woman, with long dark, wavy hair and a cape, walking through a town, not sure where in the world, but it seems to be in an open market on a busy square and a banner falls and as the pole holding the banner starts to fall, the woman holds up the pole. Someone walks up to her and asks her who she is. We, of course, think it’s Wonder Woman, but no…it’s Asteria, played by none other than the original Wonder Woman, Lynda Carter!

Apologies if you’re disappointed, I was definitely disappointed in the movie. I had such high hopes. Doesn’t mean we won’t own it some day and maybe I’ll watch it again to see if my opinion changes. As it stands, I’m set with what I thought.

I hope I didn’t ruin the movie for you, but I do look forward to your take on things!

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